Fear of a failure: why we shouldn’t be afraid of mistakes.
Most of us don’t perform any decisive actions due to one reason – we’re scared. We are scared to make mistake; we are scared to change anything; we are scared of things to become worse in the result; we are scared of being judged by people around; we are scared because we are scared.
This fear literally paralyses our will. People continue living in this prison, and forget that getting used to such an unhappy life without trying to make it better – that is what should REALLY scare them.
Mistakes break lots of lives. The cause of a tragedy is not the mistake being fatal. People just continue blaming themselves for making a mistake. They scold and hate themselves for that constantly. That is a behavior which actually leads the person to self-destruction. The trouble here is: people have the wrong attitude to their mistakes. A mistake is only an action which didn’t bring the expected result.
There are numerous proverbs telling it is natural for everyone to make mistakes. The only human who never makes any mistakes is the one doing nothing. It’s enough to be objective. Think, is it really possible to act without making mistakes?
It is unreal! Living without mistakes is impossible. When babies learn how to walk, they fall. Despite that, they stand up and continue to learn walking. Children need to discover the world around them. And if they won’t learn themselves to walk, they won’t see, get, feel, know numerous things. Important role in this process is taken by adults. Children see the way their parents and other grown-ups move, and try copying these moves. Sooner or later, the kid starts walking.
So, why, despite numerous fallings and tears, children start walking? They aren’t used to think like many elder people do. They don’t find mistakes to be something bad yet. Nobody scolds a child for the fallings: everyone understands that it’s a part of the natural learning process. Parents help their children. Additionally, the child doesn’t give a clue about what the others could think about these mistakes. The child is being moved forward by the unstoppable will to discover the world. And this goal is on top of the attention! Thanks to this will and support from grown-ups, a child starts not only walking, but running, as a result!
What happens when the child grows up? Why does it start blaming itself for mistakes sooner or later? This is a consequence coming from numerous negative reactions of parents, relatives, school teachers, classmates. Time after time, these reactions keep suggesting us wrong opinions about our own personalities.
With time, growing child forgets it can do many things, it is worth being loved, it is worth being happy and successful. Many people teach us to live the “right” way: “Get out”, “Sit still”, “It is dangerous”, “A mistake might cost you your life”.
Then, we start being afraid of trying something new. We walk through the same ways, they’re safe, we won’t make the wrong step there! And our mind is convinced that other ways are dangerous, which means they’re not needed.
Life turns into a routine. Typical, boring life of a loser! Do you understand, why it’s important to overcome your fears? If you don’t do that, if you don’t start acting, you’ll live your life lying on a sofa. Day after day…
Change your attitude to your mistakes immediately! Accept the fact you can’t avoid making them. Even if you’ll make a million, it doesn’t matter! The main thing is your attitude, and conclusions you get out of your failures.
Losers Who Make Mistakes
Have a look onto lives of famous people who continued reaching their goals, despite numerous mistakes and failures. These people achieved a lot BECAUSE OF MAKING their mistakes:
- One of the first deeds of Walt Disney was the movie company called “Laugh-o-gram Studios”. It became a bankrupt one day. But Disney didn’t give up, and brought his dream to reality. Years before the editor of a magazine where he worked fired him out of the work due to “lack of imagination” and “absence of original ideas”. Would it be better if Disney hadn’t made his mistakes?
- Steve Jobs was laid off his own company in the age of 30. He was totally despaired & depressed for a long time. Then he founded a wonderful animation-movies company “Pixar”, and later – came back to “Apple” and made this business the most expensive in the world.
- Famous football coach Jose Mourinho was laid of “Chelsea” football club despite all the success he reached. The conflict with the club’s chiefs was the reason. He found a new job, became a coach of Italian club “Internazionale”. His team won the Italian championship the same year.
Whatever way you choose, whatever will be your life goal, your attitude to your own mistakes really matters a lot. It influences your success and the tempo of your development. Will you regret your mistake once you become successful and strong some time later? Will you be able to turn your defeat into a glorious victory?
What to Do
True danger mistakes have is not the risk of making them. A real threat is to repeat the mistakes you once made. And every repeat hurts more and more, deeper and deeper. You start feeling weak, and that is a direct way to depression and wrong thoughts about your own personality. Laziness and apathy come next.
What to do with mistakes? It is needed to get rid of your negative experience, and to learn thinking another way. Take a new look onto yourself and onto your goal of being free. There always will be bumps and pits on your way, but the goal can be reached!
It is you who decides how to live further! Don’t follow the “majority”. It’s time to become strong and self-confident, and then you’ll proceed to your goals faster. Confidence makes your life happier, and the ground below your feet – harder.
If you don’t work on your mistakes, if you don’t change your attitude to them, you’re stuck in the swamp. Once you start putting efforts, stamp dries out, and you feel solid ground under your feet.